Sweet little Henry. Eleven days ago we welcomed a brand new little person into this world and into our family. Has it really been over a week? Already you have mostly lost that sweet newborn smell. Every once in a while I catch a faint whiff. We all spend countless hours holding and looking at you. When your sister first met you, she kissed you and then poked you in the eye. Trevor was shy at first. We got him to kiss you by bribing him with a trip to the nourishment room. When he returned, he wanted to hold you and, from then on, he was smitten. We are all in love.
Early Sunday morning, May 6th, two weeks before your May 20th due date, Trevor came into our room. I felt a strong contraction. Your father carried Trevor back to bed and I fell back to sleep. About one half hour later another strong contraction woke me up. Another one hit a few minutes later and with that, at 2:56 a.m., I started timing them.
The previous two nights I was awake for one to two hours with strong contractions, wondering if this was it. At my 37 week check-up six days earlier I had been dilated to 3cm, so figured things were probably still progressing, but that I was not necessarily in true labor. They eventually petered out, leaving me believing on this night that it was going to be another disappointment. After an hour of inconsistent contractions ranging from 1:47 to 10:40 minutes in frequency I got up, did my hair, brushed my teeth and packed my toiletries. I was still doubting that this was the real thing but I must have somehow sensed this night was different than the previous nights. I went to Trevor’s room to wake your father. We called Grandma Linda and asked her to come, just in case things took off and we needed to leave quickly. Around 5:00 a.m., after fifteen more minutes of deliberating and contractions that were still inconsistent but remarkably stronger, I called Dr. McNeely to give him a heads up and see what he thought. No questions for me, just one simple sentence.: “I think you should go in, Jenn.” The recollection of his voice brings tears to my eyes. It was the first time I believed we may soon be meeting our sweet, new baby.
But for some reason, my doubts persisted. As we sat in the triage room, me hooked up to monitors, the minutes ticked by with no contractions. Great, now that I’m here, they’ve stopped, I thought. Finally, a contraction hit, and I stopped feeling like a fool. The nurse checked me at about 6:15 a.m. and I was at six centimeters. They moved us into our L&D room and our nurse, Julie, walked in. We were in the same room with the same nurse we had for Charity’s birth two years earlier. They got things underway and four IV attempts plus two more sticks for a lab draw later I was resting somewhat comfortably. The contractions remained inconsistent and spread out, giving me the impression that things were moving very slowly and that we might be there for a while.
Around that time Dr. McNeely showed up. “Why do you have an IV?” he asked. “Because I want an epidural.” He kind of raised his eyebrows and proceeded to check me. That was around 7:00 a.m. My water broke during the exam and he had me at 8 to 10cm. Apparently he knew something I didn’t. On the way to the hospital Derek had commented that he was under the impression that I was not even going to try it without the epidural this time. I had gone into my other deliveries with an open mind: I’d like to do it naturally but was not opposed to the epidural. This was the first labor where I wasn’t even planning to try it without. What irony. I hemmed and hawed over trying to get an epidural in but decided to just go for it. Things really took off from there. 44 minutes and a few pushes later, I was holding you, Henry.
Without the epidural I felt totally out of control. I told Derek and the doc that I felt like a train wreck, but fortunately your father was there to look me in the eyes and keep me focused. I’m pretty sure I gave the back of his arm a good squeeze a time or two, as well. I missed the relaxed atmosphere and relatively pain-free versions of my previous labors but this experience was a good reminder that I’m really not in control. Plus I’m glad to have had the experience, to know what natural childbirth is like. There is a great sense of accomplishment in knowing I was able to do it.
After Charity was born they took her from me after just a few minutes in order to get her measurements. I learned to ask ahead of time if I could hold you and nurse you before they took you from me. I lost track of time but we must have had a good hour to hour and a half of skin to skin before I gave you up. And then found out you were a whopping 8lb., 5oz. and 21 inches long. The doctor says you have broad shoulders. I’m not sure if it’s because you are my third and it tends to get easier every time or if it had to do with the “no epidural=major pain so push like crazy” factor, but you were definitely my easiest and fastest baby to push out. Thank you for that.
Here you are with Dr. McNeely. I wish we’d had him with Trevor. I don’t know that there’s another doctor who loves his babies and mothers more.
In the next hour or more before moving to our post-partum room, we used the time to discuss a name for you. After the first month of knowing of your existence, your brother was convinced that you were a boy. We tried to prepare him for the possibility of a sister but he was down right adamant that he had a brother on the way. I joke that I was under the power of his influence, but for the first time with any of my pregnancies, I had a strong feeling that we were indeed having another son. I don’t generally trust those types of intuition and for the longest time I said, I’m thinking boy, but if it’s a girl I won’t be surprised. Toward the end, however, my story changed. I realized I had boy on the brain to the point that I knew I would be surprised if we ended up with a girl. I had expected to be holding my second son, and yet we had not yet settled on a boy name.
It was strange to us, having a baby and not knowing what to call you. We have always had names chosen months before our babies’ births. It was the same for you until two days earlier. It’s a funny story, actually. For about five months we had a first name picked out for you and we were just working on a middle name. I mentioned to your Daddy that I like alliteration, so thought that either a middle name that started with a ‘B’ to go with the first name or a ‘cuh’ sound to go with Knorr would be nice. Now, for a little background on your father. He is a huge fan of John Adams. He very seriously wanted to name you John Adams Knorr. Sorry if you someday love that idea, but I just couldn’t do it. So one day, about two months before you were born, as we were brainstorming middle names, Derek suggested ‘Quincy’. John Adams middle name, right? It had the alliteration factor and I actually decided I liked it. For two months or more we were set with a name. Then two days before your birth I was seated in our living room easy chair feeling some gentle nudgings within me. It was almost as if you, with your little kicks, directed me to my aha! moment. Something about the name just wasn’t quite right. I started thinking that John Quincy Adams was not who we thought he was. Wasn’t he a later president and the son of John Adams? But maybe they had the same middle name and the sixth POTUS used it to distinguish himself from #2. I checked wikipedia and, nope, the John Adams we intended as your namesake had no known middle name. Some fan your father is. When I told him about my revelation, he smiled kind of sheepishly and we agreed that, even though we liked the name, we couldn’t use it because it just felt like we were naming you after the wrong person. At that point in time we just decided the whole name, even the first name we had settled upon, didn’t fit and we were back to square one.
So as we held you in our arms for those first two hours, we wondered about what to call you. The name Henry has popped into my mind many times but I never thought it would fit my son. The day before your birth I had mentioned the name to Derek and he didn’t particularly care for it. On this day, the day of your birth, though, I suggested it once more. We both gazed at you and repeated it. It fit you. I saw the corners of your mouth turn up in a smile the first time I called you Henry, but your father just rolled his eyes at me and said, “Let’s not base our decision on THAT.” It didn’t matter anyway because we’d already decided you would be Henry.
Once we were up in our post-partum room, I checked the nurse’s name on the board. I asked Julie if Christi was taking us. We now had the same mother/baby nurse as last time as well. Christi told us that the room we had with Charity, room 600, was occupied but she set us up in the other large room just across the hall, 616. Thanks Christi, it’s great to have connections :0)
And then the hours of visitors and phone calls began. We were so excited to share the news of your birth with all of our family and friends. Grandma Linda showed up right away with Trevor and Charity. As Trevor held you, he looked up at me and said, “Mommy, I like him. He’s pretty special.”
The first time he heard you cry, Trevor covered his ears and said, “Henry is saying, Da-addy.” If only it were so. I think the first night of cluster feeding proved you were really calling for your mama.
Charity learned to rest her head on your tummy in an armless hug and every kiss she now gives is reserved for you. No one else gets a single smooch anymore. You were LGA (large for gestational age) so you had to endure four sets of blood sugars to ensure your levels were stable. When you screamed through the second one, Charity’s lip quivered for you and Derek and I thought she was going to cry as well.
We accompanied you and Christi to the nursery for your first bath. You didn’t like it too much.
Once your bath was complete, your Great Grandma and Grandpa Kapke showed up. Uncle Jarrod and Aunt Ana, and Great Uncle Brian and Aunt Laura followed. Brad and the kids and Adam and Mandy and Tadan. All excited to meet you. We admired and commented on your unusually long fingers and toes. We wondered who you look like and what color your eyes and hair will be. And who YOU will be. You are starting out a beautiful little person and we are excited to watch you each day as you grow more loved and more beautiful.
